Jonty Morreau

I think that the hardest moment for me in India was the evening in Mumbai before we hopped on a train and escaped to Goa. William Allen and I were sitting on the sea wall with the ocean stretched out in front of us. As we looked to the left, down the road and past the beggars, we saw the magnificence of the Taj Hotel standing next to Gateway of India. Behind us was the hustle and bustle of pedestrians walking by and cars doing whatever they so pleased. The overwhelming noise of life was occasionally punctuated by the clip clop of horse hooves, as the tourist-filled carriages passed us by. Though by this stage, three weeks into the trip, none of this was really out of the ordinary. What blew me away though was the rubbish piled up against the sea wall below. It was so high that it had formed a beach, and upon it waves were breaking. I remember in that moment truly understanding what Mr Skeen means when he tells us, “This country hurts”. How could these people care so little?

 

Interestingly, this sentiment was not on seeing the anguish of poverty. Because even in Brooklyn – the abandoned Port accommodation of Kolkata - there was so much beauty and life that we saw in the children, it was uplifting. No, it was in a wealthy suburb of Mumbai that this feeling occurred. And I think part of that was because I was scared. Scared because we are so similar to these middle-class locals surrounding us. How much do we really care for those in need? I was scared because what do I do to make the world a better place? And I am still scared because the answer is very little. 

 

India definitely opened my eyes to the world, but I think more so, it opened my eyes to who I am; which is not who I thought I was. India woke me up from a dream about who I was, what I am doing with my life, and who I want to be. I thought I was so much more than I really am, and making so much more of a difference to those around me. But as I say this, I am heading into a new start, with the excitement that I can be who I want to be.

 

I think this realisation is something I am still coming to grips with, as no doubt so many others will be. India helped to raise so many issues, all of which now sit entrenched in our minds. On tour there was mention of India being a chapter in our life story; I don’t know if the chapter is quite over yet. I think that India will sit with us in our hearts, and even if we try to overlook what we saw and felt, it will be with us always.

 

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us the most”